If you are lucky enough to have lived in Paris as a young man, then wherever you go for the rest of your life it stays with you, for Paris is a moveable feast.

- Hemingway

French men make me sick, always have done. I'm degenerate, but they are dirty with it. Not only in the physical sense either, they have greasy minds. Other foreigners may have garlic on their breath, but the frogs have it on their thoughts as well.

- Flashman

Thursday 14 October 2010

3 Things...

Really quite often I close the door to the flat and just stand in front of the lift. I don’t press the button, somehow expecting the lift to know I’m here. When I do remember to call the lift, I just stand inside it without pressing the button. This is all far too common. Maybe it’s the water?

I must start looking left then right when crossing a road. Having the road safety code drummed in to me as a child has clearly worked and I’m struggling to reverse myself, leading to some heated confrontations in the middle of the road with various Citroens and Renaults...

I must stop jealously admiring French children who I see speaking fluent...French. Whenever I see a small child chatting to their mum I think, “My goodness, what a talented child!” then it hits me right in the face...THEY’RE FRENCH.

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